Missing the old me.

Good morning my lovelies, it’s a beautiful Sunday morning and I’m wide awake now, so might as well start a blog right? 🤷‍♀️ anyway it’s been so weird for me this weekend and the last couple of days and as always I’m going to be honest with you guys.

What’s been going on?

I literally do not feel like myself at all and it’s driving me crazy and I’m worried that my medication is having a Hugh effect on my behavior, last night was the worse ever, my mood was so bad and I couldn’t control it. So to back up a little, yes I take my medicine to help with my anxiety/depression everyday in the morning usually. Yesterday started off like a normal day, everything seemed fine but then of course I started to feel with drawn and shutting down from everyone in my house, so I took to my room and stayed in my room all day. I also started to notice that my mood was altering and I was on edge and becoming really mean when I did engage with others around me. My appetite was also not good, I wasn’t eating as I should and I didn’t feel hungry.

Continuing..

Finally, I went to my mom and told her what was going on with me (she’s usually the only one that can calm me down) and she said that she also has been noticing lately a change in me, since my doctor up the dosage on my medication and she thinks he needs to either change it or lower the dosage on my medication, either way feeling like this is horrible and on top of that I’m always tired and feeling sluggish, so it’s been a roller coaster lately full of emotions and i’m waiting to get off this roller coaster ride. I’m actually glad that, I will be seeing my doctor this month because he needs to know what’s been going on with me.

What’s next..

Mental illness is so hard sometimes and I’m struggling right now, but of course I’m trying to wear a smile and keep pushing and for me, I have to take the medication because without medicine, I’m no good at all to be honest and I can’t go back to the way it was before. I will keep taking the medicine for now until my follow up appointment and hopefully my doctor will have a solution for everything that’s been going on because as of right now, I honestly have not one idea what to do, I’m stuck between what could be wrong and what really is wrong and it really is up to my doctor on what’s best and what’s the next step in this process.

Conclusion..

Anyone reading this don’t let this post get you down, we all have bad days and bad moments but it’s how we come out stronger in the end that matters and I’m going to be ok. I will continue to pray about it and I will continue to stay positive and push through with a smile on my face. I will not allow my mental illness to bring me down and I will continue to be that bright happy girl again no matter what. It’s a beautiful Sunday morning and I’m blessed for the life god has allowed me to live and I’m blessed to see another day so don’t worry it’s all going to be ok we will defeat this, so to anyone out there feeling the way that I do, you are not alone and we will be ok, time heals all wounds and remember to stay positive.

Thanks for the support as always, enjoy the rest of this beautiful Sunday 😊

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