Remember to always love YOU and put YOU first.

I wasn’t ease dropping on the conversation, however I was in a public bathroom and she basically put her business out there for the world sadly and now I’m sharing my thoughts and telling my own story in some way…

So, tonight I went out to eat with my family for my moms birthday weekend, it was a great dinner we had a great night but of course as were leaving we stop by the bathroom and I take my daughter in to change her that’s when I over heard a waitress on the phone with her boyfriend, everyone in the bathroom can hear her conversation she’s pleading and bagging her boyfriend not to leave her and to come get her from work and from her voice I can tell his telling her no witch isn’t what she wanted to hear, so she continues talking to him telling him she won’t do something again and a bunch of other things (it’s raining outside) so she was also asking him to bring her the car he was clearly saying no, finally her boss comes to the bathroom and tells her she needs to come back and finish waiting on tables then she proceeds to tell her boyfriend “I’m going to lose my job” before walking out finally.

This is why I always say self love is so so important even when your in a relationship because in order to love someone you must love yourself first always and I remember in past relationships not having that for myself so I put up with way more then I should have. It was very clear to me that this girl didn’t seem to have to much love for herself as she’s on the phone bagging her boyfriend and crying on the phone in a bathroom stall it Made me think how many women even some men deal with issues and put up with things like this because sometimes they feel that no one else will love them or that’s the only person they can get or they settle because of fear of moving on.

This post isn’t just about that waitress or her story that she honestly should of kept separate from her job but it’s for anyone out there who has ever been in situations like this and who have felt like they weren’t good enough. You have to realize sometimes we get in this situations because people portray to be one way and then once you get to know them better it’s a whole different story. When I was in my abusive relationship,I thought he was great in the beginning until I really got to know him and see that he wasn’t a good person he grew up in single parent home no father present and his mom did the best she could yes in some aspect I think that effected him a lot as he got older.( yes I also know not all people from single parent homes exhibit bad behaviors) truth is growing up I was a Hugh daddy’s girls I did everything with my dad he was the man I most admired but as i grew into a teenager our closeness kind of faded away and I sometimes feel that’s the reason I dated all the wrong guys

Also I’m not blaming everything on my dad part of this was ME too (we have a great relationship now)

I remember not having self love and it caused a lot of heartache for me in the long run. I wanna really say make sure you pick the right partner don’t get into a relationship because your lonely or because you think his a good guy but then he or she turns out not to be at all. Once you get that self love you won’t allow anyone to ever hurt you because you will love yourself enough to never accept anyone not loving you the right way. I know it’s hard because it took me years to love myself and I mean years and sometimes when it comes to my weight I still struggle with the self love part a little only because I’m always thinking I could be smaller but that’s a whole other story however when I met my current boyfriend he really taught me how a women should be treated he never calls me out my name, never disrespects me, we don’t argue and he loves me for me, well take that back we may have disagreements here and there but it dosent involve yelling and cursing each other out. It’s like you agree to disagree. (Kind of like the sky is blue nope it’s green) type of disagreements.

So, never settle, never love anyone before you (accept your children of course) never let someone make you feel like it’s your fault or belittle you and treat you less then what you are worth because somewhere out there someone is out there who is willing to love you for who you are and love you right. Some days i still look in the mirror and realize how far I’ve come from my past and how better I’ve gotten at loving me and the people around me and not settling because I’m worth being treated good.

Never beg someone to be in your life once they leave let them go because that chapter has ended and a new one will began and it will have a great ending..

Learn to love you and learn to take care of you first always and I pray and hope that waitress tonight finds that self love and makes better choices when it comes to dating because I’m sure she deserve the world but can’t see that yet but I’m sure one day she will.

Self love is the best kind of love as I always say ❤️

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Why self -love is so important/learning to love yourself.

So it’s Sunday and I wanna keep up with the theme of love, this topic is so important to me because I didn’t always love myself and I didn’t always like who I was and and it took me a really long time to realize that I was special and that I mattered. I grew up in a household where love was always shown(I’m an only child) my parents they raised me right they taught me right from wrong and I was spoiled of course so it was never a time where I didn’t feel loved or not wanted.

When I got older is when I started to struggle a little, I was being bullied in school kids would say your ugly, your fat, why do you look like that or act like that and I would come home crying, I used to beg my mom to put me in private school she would always say it will get better, it will be ok. I wanted it to be ok, I wanted those kids to leave me alone and stop picking at me but it wasn’t happening. I got to a point where I was skipping school and trying to leave early every day to avoid the kids who would pick on me eventually it started to get a little better but those words they stuck with me for a really long time.

I would stand in the full length mirror at home and wonder why I was so fat, I wanted to be smaller I was tired of feeling unattractive and over weight( I was bigger when I was in middle/high school) some of my family members would even pick at my weight they would tell me I should stop eating or how did I get that big, it use to hurt my feelings and I desperately wanted to be thin, I remember starving myself and not eating for days even going to the store to get diet pills, I was working out every day. I remember that same year I lost a lot of weight and dropped 4 pants sizes I was happy people were complimenting me and saying I looked good but still it wasn’t enough because inside I wasn’t happy with who I was at all.

I got tired of all the criticism, I was tired of trying to be what they wanted me to be. I remember crying out inside because I wanted a way out, the guy I was dating at the time told me I was going to far but in my mind it wasn’t far enough I started cutting myself to not feel the pain at all, no one knew anything I was feeling and I felt trapped and alone, between being bullied and not loving myself I was a mess, I spend more time trying to please the people around me then myself. I had to put an end to all the voices in my head and learn to love myself for me.

Once I started college all that changed, I didn’t feel so trapped or like I had to please anybody around me, I started making new friends and nobody was judging me or trying to change me, it was a good feeling to know for once that I could be myself. I started seeing the brighter side of things and realize that who was, was actually ok and I didn’t need to please anyone but myself. My life was finally the way I wanted/needed it to be with or without the approval of others-around me. The only only opinion I cared about was my own.

Loving yourself is the best thing you can ever do guys no matter what even if you’re in a relationship always remember to love you first, take care of you first and don’t let those outside voices get inside your head, it took me years to finally love myself and honestly some days I still struggle but I take it one day at a time also bullying is never ok and anyone who has dealt with that my heart goes out to you.

Your life is Important and you are loved never forget that don’t let any one ever tell you different. Once you start to love yourself things will get brighter and a lot better and you will see that you are amazing 😉

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Happy Sunday!

Sunday’s are one of my favorite days not just because it’s a day spent with relaxation and winding down, its also a day spent where I reflect on my weekend and prepare for the next week ahead, I think god for waking me up to see another day, I usually turn on the tv to watch Joel osteen his my favorite person to watch on Sunday’s he gives the best word not only that but sometimes I attend church as well and surround myself with positivity and people who spread happiness. I know every one isn’t religious and that’s ok everyone looks at Sunday’s different so wherever you are and how you choose to celebrate enjoy your Sunday and be thankful for another day of this beautiful life.

Happy Sunday!!!